Ziggy Stardust (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ziggyplayedguitar) wrote2020-06-21 09:45 pm
ziggyplayedguitar) wrote2020-06-21 09:45 pm
Entry tags:
Life of a Rockstar for Hiroki Shirogane
[Continued from here}
Ziggy had paced around for an hour feeling manic and hurt. He wasn't used to people pushing him away. It didn't matter that there were apologies and promises. Ziggy had been hurt in his life; physically but heartache was worse. He didn't like it. The whole mess of his mind gave him a migraine as he tried to sort through being pushed away and drawn in and pushed away again in an endless cycle for weeks now.
When they came together, it was glory, but then he'd walk away and Ziggy pined for him. The joy of reunion too short and another shove away. He'd been left at the dinner table of their first date even. He just walked away all the time. There was a promise in the words to never do it again. Ziggy didn't trust it. He stood for a long time leaning on the wall staring between the bedroom door and the front door. He could imagine him walking out and just not even giving him a second glance.
This was insanity. Ziggy broke out the whiskey as he paced. He chugged 5ths because it barely effected him though it dulled his cares. Then he'd turned to lines of cocaine to numb his emotions. Drugs effected him differently than a human. More whiskey and staring out windows at the dark. He even stood at the bedroom door tempted to bash it down when he started feeling the numbness and then walked away. Empty whiskey bottles were here and there all over the townhouse before he had any direction.
He went into the room he'd set up as a studio of sorts to write. Still in just the robe. Who cared? Head phones on to blot out the world and a ball on to record in case something good came out. He started with things he'd already wrote, songs he liked that weren't his. He eventually started to go stream of consciousness. things came and went.
Then a song stuck and he worked on it. This was where his empathy went wild. When he sang something new, sang because he needed the words. The pain and the hope of what was happening to his heart laid out in his voice and the guitar. The rest of the world could have been laid to waste and he might not notice.
Every time I think of what you pulled me through, dear
Fascination moves sweeping near me
Still I take ya
fascination
(Sure 'nuff) fascination
(Takes a part of me) takes a part of me
(Can a heart beat) can a heart beat
(Live in a fever) live in a fever?
(Raging inside of me?)
(Fascination) fascination
(Oh, yeah) oh yeah
(Takes a part of me) takes a part of me
(I can't help it) I can't help it
(I've got to use her) got to use her
(Every time, ooh)
Fascination comes around
(Ooh, oo, ooh)
your soul is calling
Like when I'm walking
Seems that everywhere I turn
I hope you're waiting for me
I know that people think
That I'm a little crazy
[the song Ziggy is currently 'writing']
Ziggy had paced around for an hour feeling manic and hurt. He wasn't used to people pushing him away. It didn't matter that there were apologies and promises. Ziggy had been hurt in his life; physically but heartache was worse. He didn't like it. The whole mess of his mind gave him a migraine as he tried to sort through being pushed away and drawn in and pushed away again in an endless cycle for weeks now.
When they came together, it was glory, but then he'd walk away and Ziggy pined for him. The joy of reunion too short and another shove away. He'd been left at the dinner table of their first date even. He just walked away all the time. There was a promise in the words to never do it again. Ziggy didn't trust it. He stood for a long time leaning on the wall staring between the bedroom door and the front door. He could imagine him walking out and just not even giving him a second glance.
This was insanity. Ziggy broke out the whiskey as he paced. He chugged 5ths because it barely effected him though it dulled his cares. Then he'd turned to lines of cocaine to numb his emotions. Drugs effected him differently than a human. More whiskey and staring out windows at the dark. He even stood at the bedroom door tempted to bash it down when he started feeling the numbness and then walked away. Empty whiskey bottles were here and there all over the townhouse before he had any direction.
He went into the room he'd set up as a studio of sorts to write. Still in just the robe. Who cared? Head phones on to blot out the world and a ball on to record in case something good came out. He started with things he'd already wrote, songs he liked that weren't his. He eventually started to go stream of consciousness. things came and went.
Then a song stuck and he worked on it. This was where his empathy went wild. When he sang something new, sang because he needed the words. The pain and the hope of what was happening to his heart laid out in his voice and the guitar. The rest of the world could have been laid to waste and he might not notice.
Every time I think of what you pulled me through, dear
Fascination moves sweeping near me
Still I take ya
fascination
(Sure 'nuff) fascination
(Takes a part of me) takes a part of me
(Can a heart beat) can a heart beat
(Live in a fever) live in a fever?
(Raging inside of me?)
(Fascination) fascination
(Oh, yeah) oh yeah
(Takes a part of me) takes a part of me
(I can't help it) I can't help it
(I've got to use her) got to use her
(Every time, ooh)
Fascination comes around
(Ooh, oo, ooh)
your soul is calling
Like when I'm walking
Seems that everywhere I turn
I hope you're waiting for me
I know that people think
That I'm a little crazy
[the song Ziggy is currently 'writing']
no subject
"I know."
"I have no right to live after what I've done to my team - my family. But - hurting you would be just as bad, so if you want me, I'll stay. That's - actually, that's what I've said, a few ticks ago. That I'm yours."
Yours. Forever.
Love... he already loved Ziggy, by now. Love did not... take much time, for him to... he was realising that, slowly, recently.
He loved Keith the first time he met him, and even the memories couldn't quite be to blame, there.
Ditto Lance, and Matt, and-
What, he loved Keith, when he met him, after the week of starvation? Yes, but surely not that way? Or. Maybe. Yes, that way. H-huh... Huh! But nevermind that, that was in the past.
The point was. He already loved Ziggy, by now. And if Ziggy was beginning to fall in love with him - how could he force himself to regret that, try to stop Ziggy, or something, oh, how?
He was weak. Very, very weak. Since he couldn't even do that much.
Still, he smiles, genuinely, with affection, at his forever Ziggy.
"Mhm, I'd follow you even to hell or-"
Suddenly, he shudders.
Hell? What was hell? He's just remembered worse. His own hell.
"I have to help them," he says, suddenly, though he probably won't say what he means if asked.
Other clones. People just like him.
If he was a person - and Ziggy and Matt Holt insisted he was a person, so, sure - then, so were the other clones of Shiro. Nothing else would make sense.
no subject
As Hiroki continued to try and get better Ziggy saw his strength. He didn't see weakness. He saw humanity.
"Help who?" Ziggy asks with genuine interest though he's found a comfortable spot to nestle against Hiroki's chest. It felt so good to lay against him.
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He has no right to ask, but-
"Others like me. Clones of Shiro. I should go help them right now. I'm so horribly selfish, here...!"
Familiar self-loathing, again.
It seems it'll be reoccuring, if he does nothing.
no subject
"Sshhh" Ziggy stroke his hair. "You need to take care of yourself first. Then we can help them."
He definitely said we and paused after that, confused by his own thoughts.
no subject
Ahhh, this is so unbelievably nice, on a normal day would be, even, and now with the unimaginable before lack of chronic headache (was that the witch????), it feels simply... divine.
And because it's Ziggy doing that, not a friend (well, friend, too, but...), but the love of his new life, one clone here might...
Come soon, again. He's close to--
And then he hears-
"Yes, yes, yes, we will - we will--- yes, we---"
Breathless.... Panting... and oh so close-
no subject
Whatever Ziggy might have said is lost to that spike of arousal and lust. He's easy to flip, so easy to pull into the more positive emotions.
Ziggy slides right into his lap, straddling him, chests pressed together. He can only moan when he sinks into Hiroki's lap. The words come low, seductive and chased by emotional, desperate need. "Fuck me."
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But, he suddenly has a strange thought... hmmm... maybe if...?
"Right after you say Please, Hiroki, fuck me. ...o-ok-kay...? You don't have to add 'sir', I'm off duty..."
Sorry... he just... oh, but... Ziggy surely won't... what is he-- maybe he-- oh, let's just... he can take it back, if.. oh.
For a moment, he doesn't move, just, quivering, waiting to see, if Ziggy -- will-- or maybe. Maybe Ziggy won't, this is a mistake, a mistake... or not?
no subject
"Please, Hiroki, fuck me." Ziggy rolls his body cat-like against Hiroki, face burying in his neck. He adds to it with a purr. "I want your cock."
For the right person he could be incredibly submissive. Hiroki was one of the right people.
1/2
Oooh, this - this is better than he had dreamt of.
So amazing!
He... wants to be Hiroki, become Hiroki, he, whoever... whoever that might be
No, he IS Hiroki.
And it's ever so desired... to hear this voice saying the name, new name, own name, best would be over and over and over again, and... oh, Voltron... oh, gods... this is sublime...
Hiroki smirks, utters, though it's hard to speak right now...
"Mhm... Ziggy..good soldier... welcome to... the Voltron Coalition----fff--qui---fuck, quiznaking fuck, I---!!"
He gets on top of Ziggy.
2/2
moaning, panting,
He puts his cock into Ziggy.
He is...oooh---!!! So--- hard--- oh, Ziggy... he has no idea how... how much, he--!!
no subject
"I'm only good for you, sir." He whispers as he's put back on the bed. And the weight on him, Ziggy gasps, ragged. He's hard, horny. He just wants and doesn't care how he's taken.
He wince at being take so quickly but it instantly turns to pleasure. It takes his breath for a moment. "I've been desperate for you."
Then the euphoria starts amidst the moans of pleasure and gasps of Hiroki's name. Most people described it like drugs; uppers, euphorics, but it was a side effect of his pleasure and his natural emotional broadcast. There had been those in the past who'd become addicted to him, even fans sometimes without sharing his bed. It was unwanted then but now....
Hooking his knees up around Hiroki's hips, Ziggy grabs for his hair, shoulders, anywhere he can get a hold of. His whole body is pushing up to meet the rock of his lover's hips. "DAMN! You're perfect Hiroki.. you... oh harder, please....Make me yours." He's begging after wanting him for so long.
no subject
Well, definitely a he in bed, but...
And...
sir, he said.
"Wonderful," he says. "Now, you can start with--"
Shiro---
No, Hiroki---
Wanted to hear that.
And then, he's hit with... something...
It stuns him for a moment, it feels so good, no, much better than that, he wasn't made for this, this is too much!! Too much of a good thing, of, to Shi--- Hiroki right now, pure ecstasy, he pales, his chest heaves, his hand's shaking uncontrollably, he can't handle it, he's not ready for this, his heart is beating faster and faster; and he gasps for breath, because, for a few ticks, Hiroki Shirogane literally can't breathe.
no subject
"Hey! Hey." the euphoric feeling dims to near silence. "Breathe."
It's like Hiroki's having a panic attack, though the emotions are quite different than any panic attack. He smiles and shakes his head just a little. "Don't go passing out on me yet."
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He nods weakly.
Inhale. Exhale.
Inhale. Exhale.
Okay, his heart's thumping, but he's getting the hang of it.
"Ziggy, hey, Ziggy... Ziggy... Ziggy, Ziggy, I can... make a Guiness Record on number of own deaths... please make sure to report me..."
Heh.
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He's staring up into Hiroki's eyes with a pleased smile. Ziggy's still breathing short and heavy. "Was it the euphoria?"
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Hiroki seems to be on a verge of passing out, right now, still.
"More, o... please... more... give me more..."
"It's like --- like being in the Black Lion again, and-- "
no subject
"I'll give you all you want. Slow down and enjoy me."
no subject
"I don't want to slow down," he whispers hoarsely. "I won't. I feel-- alive!"
He then runs his left hand through Ziggy's hair, trying to think, to wonder, was there any possible reason in this reality for Shiro to slow down? Er, that is, for Hiroki? No, he didn't think so!
Why'd there be? Such a feeling--- such a rush--- could not possibly be a crime---!!!
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Ziggy takes another, slightly more intense kiss. "I'll be right here anytime you want more." He might of said more but the fingers in his hair have him moaning.
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What is he even supposed to do right now, if he can't---?!
Hiroki grabs a fistful of Ziggy's hair and tugs.
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That tug takes his breath, nearly his ability to think. It gets a gasp and a shiver all through Ziggy's body. Then another rush of that euphoric feeling and Ziggy's nails digging into his shoulders. He doesn't hurt him or break the skin.. not yet. Not unless he keeps up with the hair pulling.
He doesn't speak, instead he starts rocking his hips, slowly and sensually. Words weren't necessary if he could show Hiroki what to do.
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Hiroki comes, moaning Ziggy's name, too exhausted to scream it. With enother injection of the... Ziggy's... everything... the young clone might pass out very soon, in truth.
He's suddenly afraid that he'll accidentally pin and imprison his... fiance...?...(?)... with his body once he loses consciousness, so he rolls slightly away from Ziggy, letting go of the Antean, only touching his shoulder with his left hand, now, but otherwise separate.
Panting, moaning, dizzy and... Hiroki might faint soon. He suddenly realises that even if this was to kill him, he'd regret nothing, and by no means would he stop, how could he stop...
How, oh, how?
"Z-Ziggy. Ziggy. Ziggy. Ziggy--"
He whispers, over and over. Like a mantra. He's getting very faint.
"Ziggy. Please, marry me, aaahhhhh---!!--- I beg you--- - Ziggy--- Ziggy---" he utters, more and more faint, barely audible, and, now, barely conscious. One more moment and he might lose consciousness, quite soon.
"Ziggy, Ziggy, Ziggy---"
Tears are rolling off Hiroki's cheeks now.
no subject
He rolls over too, to curl up at the human's side. Contact was always good. But then that question!
Ziggy's heard a lot of things in the heat of passion. Never this one. It stuns him at first, then panics him. He takes a couple breaths and then leans up to kiss Hiroki's cheek.
"You'll have to ask my mother to take me as yours." It was a good deflection to give him time to try and process that question, request? However, it was true of Anthean culture that the mother of the woman, and Ziggy certain felt feminine with this man, had to be asked. Only when the mother was satisfied that the match was good could a marriage be arranged.
"It's Anthean tradition." He gives him another kiss before settling down at his side again.
no subject