Life of a Rockstar for Hiroki Shirogane

[ziggyplayedguitar]

[Continued from here}

Ziggy had paced around for an hour feeling manic and hurt. He wasn't used to people pushing him away. It didn't matter that there were apologies and promises. Ziggy had been hurt in his life; physically but heartache was worse. He didn't like it. The whole mess of his mind gave him a migraine as he tried to sort through being pushed away and drawn in and pushed away again in an endless cycle for weeks now.

When they came together, it was glory, but then he'd walk away and Ziggy pined for him. The joy of reunion too short and another shove away. He'd been left at the dinner table of their first date even. He just walked away all the time. There was a promise in the words to never do it again. Ziggy didn't trust it. He stood for a long time leaning on the wall staring between the bedroom door and the front door. He could imagine him walking out and just not even giving him a second glance.

This was insanity. Ziggy broke out the whiskey as he paced. He chugged 5ths because it barely effected him though it dulled his cares. Then he'd turned to lines of cocaine to numb his emotions. Drugs effected him differently than a human. More whiskey and staring out windows at the dark. He even stood at the bedroom door tempted to bash it down when he started feeling the numbness and then walked away. Empty whiskey bottles were here and there all over the townhouse before he had any direction.

He went into the room he'd set up as a studio of sorts to write. Still in just the robe. Who cared? Head phones on to blot out the world and a ball on to record in case something good came out. He started with things he'd already wrote, songs he liked that weren't his. He eventually started to go stream of consciousness. things came and went.

Then a song stuck and he worked on it. This was where his empathy went wild. When he sang something new, sang because he needed the words. The pain and the hope of what was happening to his heart laid out in his voice and the guitar. The rest of the world could have been laid to waste and he might not notice.

Every time I think of what you pulled me through, dear
Fascination moves sweeping near me
Still I take ya
fascination

(Sure 'nuff) fascination
(Takes a part of me) takes a part of me
(Can a heart beat) can a heart beat
(Live in a fever) live in a fever?
(Raging inside of me?)
(Fascination) fascination
(Oh, yeah) oh yeah
(Takes a part of me) takes a part of me
(I can't help it) I can't help it
(I've got to use her) got to use her
(Every time, ooh)
Fascination comes around
(Ooh, oo, ooh)

your soul is calling
Like when I'm walking
Seems that everywhere I turn
I hope you're waiting for me
I know that people think
That I'm a little crazy


[the song Ziggy is currently 'writing']

Comments

[ziggyplayedguitar]

There's passing irritation when Hiroki pulls away. Ziggy is still wildly aroused and needs more, but his lover is new to this and that curbs the feelings. It's to be expected for a virgin to be a little too quick and easily exhausted.

He rolls over too, to curl up at the human's side. Contact was always good. But then that question!

Ziggy's heard a lot of things in the heat of passion. Never this one. It stuns him at first, then panics him. He takes a couple breaths and then leans up to kiss Hiroki's cheek.

"You'll have to ask my mother to take me as yours." It was a good deflection to give him time to try and process that question, request? However, it was true of Anthean culture that the mother of the woman, and Ziggy certain felt feminine with this man, had to be asked. Only when the mother was satisfied that the match was good could a marriage be arranged.

"It's Anthean tradition." He gives him another kiss before settling down at his side again.

[somekindofspaceuncle]

Hiroki nods weakly, then passes out.